Elements of Gratitude and Compassion in Buddhism
This is another essay I thought I’d share with you, written for one of my favourite units and Professors - Michael Zammit - in the field of Eastern Philosophy. Hope you enjoy!
Synopsis
This piece of work aims to be an exploration into what and who creates suffering in life, and how this very element [suffering] affects our outlook upon events and circumstances and the way we relate to life itself. Do gratitude and compassion help to sooth and diminish this pain? How and why are gratitude and compassion essential in our lives? What comes out of suffering, and is it somewhat necessary for our wellbeing? These are a few of the questions which will be addressed throughout this essay and hopefully each one of us can come to a better understanding when applying them to our own experience.
The Indomitable Elements of Gratitude and Compassion through Suffering in Buddhism
‘It is good to have an end to journey toward;
but it is the journey that matters most in the end’
- Ernest Hemingway
Nietzsche once said that ‘He who has a why to live for, can bear with almost any how’. This I believe to be so true. Being able to see the why is the key. Suffering is inevitable; once there is feeling, emotions and the possibility of expression then anything one experiences will be felt with a certain passion. Viktor Frankl explains in his book Man’s Search for Meaning (1959), that suffering is in fact man’s destiny. Yet, it is by accepting this fact as a task, a unique and solitary task, that we allow for a spectrum of opportunities in the manner in which one bears the burden (Frankl 1959) - implying a choice in how we view the situation. This voyage, that is Man’s search for Meaning, may not always arouse equilibrium but inner tension too. After all, it is not the question of ‘who am I?’, it is the recognition that as long as we remember this question and its limitlessness then that is what matters. Homeostasis is not what we aim for, in any case, rather it is the ‘striving for a worthwhile goal, freely undertaken’ that Man needs. The remedy for Frankl is love; it is the ‘only way to grasp another human being in the innermost core of their personality’. It is through loving that one enables the other to actualize potentialities.
Gratitude
Cicero believed gratitude to be “the greatest of the virtues and parent of all others”. Gratitude is an attitude; an outlook upon life and experiences. It is the sense of appreciation one holds for the things one has or goes through, the people that come and go through one’s life. A great deal of attention is placed upon gratitude in positive psychology, as this area focuses on how an individual can cultivate it so that it can increase well-being and overall happiness in oneself as well as others (Psychology Today n.d.). Mencius was convinced that the mind had a part to play between the lesser and greater self, getting the priorities between the two right would lead to fulfilment. Most importantly, happiness is what motivates people to do the right thing, through the practice of humanity (The Pursuit of Happiness 2016).
Gratitude is also linked to empathy, but the difference between the two must be noted. They work hand-in-hand, as empathy is the understanding of another’s’ perspective, whilst gratitude would be acting upon the empathy felt and experienced.
Perception, of course, depends on various experiences one has faced and how one has dealt with and viewed these. In other words it depends on one’s karmic vision. Different people will perceive an element such as fire in a multitude of ways; a realized being can only see with a primordial sacredness. As Sogyal Rinpoche puts forward in The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying (1988), there are three types of vision: the “impure” vision of ordinary beings, the “vision of experience” open to those who practice meditation, and the “pure vision” through which a realized being perceives the world as spontaneously perfect (Rinpoche 1988). As Blake simply writes:
If the doors of perception were cleansed,
Everything would appear...as it is, infinite. (ed. Keynes 1972)
In the Mahayana (a great movement in the history of Buddhism) emphasis is placed on the virtues of karuna (compassion) and prajna (insight), along with the virtues grouped as The Six Perfections: dana (generosity), sila (morality), ksanti (patience), virya (perseverance), samadhi (meditation) and prajna (insight) (Keown 2005).
Compassion
The first thing that comes to mind when ruminating about compassion is the African ubuntu concept, highlighted in Nelson Mandela’s way of life. The whole idea is that ‘I am because you are’. What a beautiful way to define this complete mode of kindness towards others and towards ourselves. The Buddha emphasizes this reciprocity by saying that ‘If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete’.
All cultures have explored the most basic and yet profound aspects that make up human experience. The Greeks believed that everything should be done with a sense of meraki – that is, to do something with soul, with love and in this way you leave a piece of yourself in the work. Japanese wabi-sabi comes close to this aspect and links to self-compassion in the sense that it is a way of living that focuses on finding beauty within the imperfections of life and accepting the natural cycle of growth and decay.
Compassion comes often as a response to someone else’s suffering, and most importantly acts to relieve this suffering/pain as much as possible. Compassion is the connection formed through identifying oneself with another. It has also been a very important notion worked upon in positive and social psychology. It is very much linked to happiness and aids one to diffuse the anger which lies within, manifesting itself due to expectations or problems in one’s macrocosm. It also takes a certain amount of courage to show compassion, to be brave enough to go against the current in some situations. The author Paulo Coelho captures this when he says that ‘tolerance and compassion are qualities of fearless people’. The Dalai Lama commented that we need to worry about self-disarmament. Our refusal to forgive is what motivates anger and violence towards others. Therefore, we must turn within to control our motivations and our mind (Philosophy Matters 2013).
As the Dalai Lama says in A Call to Compassion (Dalai Lama XIV n.d.), when one is concerned with one’s own interests then there is little room left for others. In his own words ‘...since compassion is the source of happiness, self-centeredness prevents us from attaining that spiritual peace—peace of heart and mind—which is the principal characteristic of lasting happiness’. Hence, in giving more meaning to others’ lives we enhance the meaning in ours. His Holiness refers to compassion as “wise selfishness”, as it is a means to bring us happiness - that is ‘in serving others we serve ourselves’.
The Tibetan name for the Buddha of compassion is Chenrézig – ‘Chen’ is the eye, ‘ré’ being the corner of the eye, and ‘zig’ is to see. Therefore, the compassionate eyes see the needs of all (The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying p. 67,68). Karuna (compassion) is one of the ‘Divine Abidings’, which also include metta (loving-kindness), mudita (sympathetic joy) and upekkha (equanimity) (Keown 2005).
Christianity may be said to be based on compassion with quotes such as: ‘Do to others as you would have them do to you’ (Luke 6:31) and ‘Clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience’ (Colossians 3:12). The idea and ideal that is compassion really comes out in the parable of the Good Samaritan, from which we are taught to help and care for others regardless of their beliefs and social standings. To care enough that one is able to love one’s enemies or those who have let one down. Another example is the parable of the prodigal son. The son is forgiven by the father completely without condition, yet the brother is disappointed with this leniency. This is a feeling the reader can resonate with, yet two important facts are left out of the story, which the reader might ask. Did the prodigal son in fact stay with his family or did he leave soon after? Also, did the brother join the feast his father lovingly hosted for the return of his son? The choice of whether to stay in peace or leave in anger is always there for us to make.
‘Compassion is not religious business, it is human business, it is not a luxury, it is essential for our own peace and mental stability, it is essential for human survival’ – Dalai Lama
The French philosopher and historian Michel Foucault (1926-1984) sought to critically examine the traditional questions and responses to ‘what types of human beings are there?’ and ‘what is their essence?’ among others. His conception of Man was one with a constant essence, a double essence at that. On the one hand we have Man as an object (obedient to physical laws), and on the other Man as a subject (an agent uniquely capable of understanding to fulfil himself). In The Order of Things (1966), as well as in other writings he suggests that a truly free man could not exist. As with the advent of ‘man’ came the notion that body and soul can be reformed. A concern with ethics led him to the study of how people care for one another in relations such as friendship. This, in turn, led to a meditation to understand What is Enlightenment? which was published posthumously (Encyclopædia Britannica 2014).
Enlightenment requires meditation, this being ‘bringing the mind back home’ (Rinpoche 1988), which nowadays may be taught as mindfulness, or in other words the road to ‘buddhahood’. It is the viewing of emotions and thoughts rather than suppressing or indulging in them. This will lead to real self-love and ultimate respect. Therefore, compassion can be recognised as the fusion of love and wisdom (Zammit 2016).
Suffering
In the Dalai Lama’s book Daily Advice from the Heart (2004) he comments that we need to recognize that ‘suffering is a part of life, or in Buddhist terms, of samsara...our attitude is the problem. Happiness is possible only when we call suffering no longer causes us distress’ (Dalai Lama 2004).
Tibetans have a saying that suffering is ‘a broom that sweeps away all our negative karma’ (Rinpoche 1988). Karma, understood as the law of cause and effect. By observing the law of karma, allowing ourselves to express love and compassion and purify our mindset then we are on the way to enlightenment.
Albert Einstein said in 1954:
‘...Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison (delusion) by widening our circles of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty’
The nature of the human condition is duhkha (suffering due to the clutter that surrounds us and we allow into our lives) from desire which eventually leads to the annihilation of inner happiness – lust among other vices being touched upon in the Buddha’s Fire Sermon. Buddhism, in many ways, can be viewed as a dialogue with contemporary anguish. When encountering loneliness (an experience of suffering), overcoming the shame that accompanies this human struggle is the first step to a happier self. If Buddhism is used to compliment one’s life as a method, a way of living and not a rigid doctrine then personal peace and enlightenment will follow.
Transcendence requires our acceptance of suffering and of life’s trials. This personal effort towards cleansing our inner conflict is necessary to appreciate nirvana – everyday life which comes to be seen and felt in a different manner (Zammit 2016). All our senses and choices are inextricably linked through our chitta which is the attitude with which we experience life.
Possession is the true cause of trishna (chronic frustration). The idea of losing sight of what actually is is important here. The focus in Buddhism is on remembering through having an open or central attention so that our mind can be flexible to our surroundings. We need to move away from scattered or captured attention which leads to forgetfulness. Attention, which is our awareness, is essentially our consciousness (the profound understanding of the human condition) (Zammit 2016).
The essence of the experience of life is presented in the 4 noble Truths of Buddhism:
o Duhkha – all existence is suffering
o Samudaya – suffering is caused by craving
o Nirodha – suffering can have an end
o Marga – the way to the end of suffering is the Noble Eightfold Path
To touch upon each Truth briefly: firstly there is suffering due to the five factors of individuality (due to the physical form, sensations, cognition, traits, awareness); craving stems from desires*, existence and the destructive self (low self-esteem and negative thoughts) which give rise to the cycle of rebirth/reincarnation; once the craving is controlled then the suffering ceases and there is a sense of liberation; the 8-fold path focuses on the true view which leads towards nirvana.
*It is good to note that the right desires liberate and enhance the individual. It is only when a desire is tainted from excessiveness or viewing it for the wrong purposes that it becomes destructive (Zammit 2016).
The 8-fold path is divided by prajna (insight), sila (morality) and samadhi (meditation) (Keown 2005).
The philosopher Jung touches upon the notion of this inner destructive self. The goal of Jung’s Self is wholeness which allows for personal adjustment to the social environment but also to God, the cosmos and the life of the spirit (Stevens 1994). The destructive or ‘shadow’ self is a complex that can be ignored but which is ever-present and manifests itself most especially in dreams where archetypes of the Enemy or the Predator come into being (Stevens 1994). The whole complex is built upon the fear of rejection and feelings of guilt. Therefore it is important to face and come to know these innate fears. This destructive image is worked on and used in all wars and types of ethnic cleansing; when Adolf Hitler described the Jews as sub-humans the Germans were able to project their collective shadow onto another race, thereby making the Holocaust possible. To own and overcome one’s shadow is to ‘become responsible for it, so that one’s morality is less blind and less compulsive’ (Stevens 1994). This is termed ‘shadow consciousness’, it leads to social harmony and understanding. Jung also talked about the Creator and created being in evolution together with one’s consciousness influencing the other. So, a human might influence the force behind archetype - God becomes conscious as humans become more so (Pinkola Estés 1995).
Some suffering we can overcome with ease. The suffering which we bring upon ourselves and can recognize such as that brought about by attachment, expectations, self-pity and the like. Non-attachment in Buddhism implies the absence of the selfish desire to put one’s own needs before anyone else’s. Hence, one of the most important virtues is dana (generosity) (Keown 2005).
A certain amount of suffering is of course essential to one’s being and Nature, in that it is only through suffering that one can appreciate the other elements that make up life - it is only thanks to the darkness that we have light. Beauty and the simplest of moments are highlighted possibly only thanks to their contrast. It is the balance of emotions and the recognition of feeling. The moment in which open-hearted suffering can become compassion suffering comes to an end and the full potential of happiness is fulfilled.
In such a way sacrifice is given meaning. If there was no meaning then one would do well to avoid what is causing the suffering/pain. Life’s meaning becomes an unconditional one as it ‘includes the potential meaning of unavoidable suffering’ (Frankl 1959). Man is after all free and self-determining; yet with this freedom comes responsibility.
These views of compassion and gratitude extend towards the protection of all life and the environment if we are to apply them wholly. The concepts go along with the beliefs of non-violence and equality given to life. Violence is an action that produces more suffering – Viktor Frankl having been exposed to the terrors of living in a Nazi concentration camp was able to see his positive theory of logotherapy be applied to reality. Confucius’ Analects focuses a great deal on social relationships and the idea of humanity. To him, learning about and trying to realize the latter in our lives will lead to a sense of joy. Confucius was probably the first to argue that the individual has the power to change himself (The Pursuit of Happiness 2016). This resonates with Hemingway’s view of life - it isn’t the destination that is of utter importance, it is the ability to appreciate everything as an end in itself and not a means to an end. In this way the journey will be given a whole new meaning, it will be imbued with meaning it never could have had, along with a sense of serenity. It is the kind of meaning Buddhism can put us on the true path towards, it is a process that takes time and forgiveness until surely we will see and be our actual selves.
Yet, how is it possible to say ‘yes’ to life when pain, guilt and death (the “tragic triad” in logotherapy) are present? In Frankl’s eyes, saying yes to life in spite of everything implies (1) turning suffering into a human achievement and accomplishment; (2) deriving from guilt the opportunity to change oneself for the better; and (3) deriving from life’s transitoriness an incentive to take responsible action. One must have a sense of reason to be ‘happy’, yet once this reason is realized then caring for it becomes automatic (Frankl 1959).
‘If we are not kind to ourselves, we cannot be kind to others. In order to love others and be tender, in order to wish them happiness and freedom from suffering, we must first have these feelings for ourselves...love and compassion become possible (Dalai Lama 2004).
Through suffering we always have the choice of how to look at the situation and react to it – our attitude towards it. All we need to do is take a step back (so to speak) and see the situation as it truly is, not as we may wish it to be. This is easier said than done, at first, yet with patience, practice and meditation we will be able to see past the haze and confusion leading towards sukha (pure happiness). It is also good to keep in mind that the experience is greater at times than where it takes us. In Spinoza’s Ethics we have this beautiful line – sed omnia praeclara tam difficilia quam rara sunt – ‘everything great is just as difficult to realize as it is rare to find’ (Frankl 1959). Hence, it is the moment in its entirety, one bardo (transition) to the next that is worth appreciating. Sometimes only when looking back can we see the truly important moments, living in the present allows for a greater calm and understanding of our Universality.
‘The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction, not a destination.’
- Carl Rogers
Reference List
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